Workshop (cont), Haiku, & Martian Chronicles

Today, please continue your workshop during period 7. Most of you will complete the workshop before the end of class. Please begin your revisions on any of the work you have just workshopped, continue your homework from last class (check the blog entry for details), and/or try a few summer haiku.

Summer kigo words:

Summer solstice, summer evening, summer morning, slow day, short night, summer fog, lightning, sudden shower, summer dew, cloud peaks, scorching/blazing sun, bare feet, awning, sunburn, sunglasses, ice tea, sweat, cactus flower, summer grove, lake, fly, swatter, carnation, marigold, gardenia, moth, cicada, perfume, waterfall, fan, independence day, weeding, blue cornflower, honeysuckle, cherry, strawberries, blackberries, sunflower, snapdragon, potato, carrots, melons, lotus

Use a kigo word and an observation of a natural object in juxtaposition. Your haiku should be 10 or fewer words, and, of course, 17 or fewer syllables.

Period 8 (part 1): The Martian Chronicles analysis.

Check out the following stories:
1. Pg. 118: The Old Ones (we will deconstruct this story together)
2. Pg. 131: The Luggage Store

• Reread the story quickly.
• What did you notice?: jot down your observations of the story on your index card.
• Taken out of context of the book as a whole, how does Bradbury unify the story?
•  The unities were primarily used in drama to keep a writer from going too far afield with an idea.  The unities come in three general types:
• Unity of time
• Unity of place
• Unity of action
• Short fiction (flash fiction, sudden fiction, micro fiction) often follows the unities.

3. Pg. 166: There Will Come Soft Rains
This is perhaps the single most significant story in the book and is often anthologized. It is a chilling and subtle story and you may notice that it has some similarities with other stories in the book (particularly, since we covered it in class, the first story in the novel).

Discuss & Answer:

• How does Bradbury structure his story?
• What is the significance of the allusion Bradbury uses in the story on page 169?
• What is the meaning or theme of this story? What lesson(s) does Bradbury give us?

Period 8 (part 2): Please prepare for your reading of the Madonnas of Leningrad by visiting these sites:

The Hermitage Museum
Please spend some time taking the virtual tour and viewing the artwork.

IDEA FOR A POEM: Write a poem draft based on one of the pieces in the Hermitage Museum.

The Siege of Leningrad

IDEA FOR A PLAY/STORY: Use the historical information to tell a short story, scene, or play taking place in the siege of Leningrad.

The Russian Ark by Alexander Sokurov
The Making of the film The Russian Ark (part one) (other parts can be found online as well).

IDEA FOR A FILM PROJECT: Create a short film where you take a continuous take (or fewer than 3 takes to tell the entire story) (a story in 1 continuous shot (or up to 3 continuous shots))

HOMEWORK: Finish and study for your test on The Martian Chronicles (Friday). Write a draft in the style of Bradbury. Use the Martian Chronicles as a model for your own idea. Continue writing haiku, continue preparing a workshop piece and revising. Place new drafts in your portfolios. Begin reading The Madonnas of Leningrad.

Workshop Advice

"One of the most important skills to have as a writer is that of being a skilled reader." -- Andrea Beca

Some quick tips about getting the most out of a workshop:

1. Start with the positives: before discussing what doesn't work or what needs to be changed or cut, start with what IS working in the piece. Although difficult at times for the overly-critical, try to say at least one significant thing that is working.

2. Always back up what you say with a specific example. "I like your story" doesn't help much, but "I like your story BECAUSE I could relate to the protagonist" is better.

3. Avoid using words like: "stupid", "bad", or "pointless" (and for positive comments: "good", "I like it", or "you're a great writer" without providing examples of what is working in the piece).

4. Try not to let your personal opinions and feelings get in the way. You may not like the genre or style the writer uses, but you may also not be the target audience. Try to keep an open mind.

5. Balance your personal opinions with objective comments.

6. Remember: you're not the writer. When giving feedback, while you might suggest what you would do in the situation, the author is perfectly capable of (and allowed to) smiling politely and ignoring your advice.

7. As a writer: you wrote your work. What you do after working with a piece is up to you.

Preparing for Workshop & Pointing

During period 7, please prepare for the workshop (period 8).

Look through your portfolio and your writing files and select a poem, short story, play script, etc. that you would like to revise and/or get feedback by your peers on.

If you can print enough copies for your workshop groups, please do so. If your piece is short and your workshop group willing, you can instead read the selection or poem to the group without printing, but it often helps to have the words in front of the reviewer.

When your workshop is over (with everyone having the chance to share and discuss their work) please revise or continue working or write a new piece. You may at this point select fiction, poetry, or plays.


Workshop procedures: POINTING
Why use it?: Great for diction (and therefore tone), poetry, or making sure important lines are noticed by a reader. Works best with poetic verse.

POINTING is a workshop tool where each workshop member hears or reads the piece up for workshop and selects a word, phrase, or sentence from the piece. Going around the group taking turns, each workshop member reads his/her selection (word, phrase, or sentence) out loud so that the author hears the line that the reviewer liked. Effectively, you could continue doing this practice as long as there is something the reviewer liked. Each time the author hears a word, phrase, or sentence selected, he/she makes a check mark next to the word, phrase, or line on his/her copy of the workshop piece. At the end, the author should have various lines checked. If a poet, for example, has everyone in the group say that they liked a line, there is physical proof (the check marks) that the line works for the reader.

What to do with this information?: After pointing, go back and see what you might be able to cut (usually the words, phrases or lines no one selected). Consider WHY the word, phrase, or sentence worked and try to replicate that throughout the piece.

While pointing is meant to be a positive experience, the author is in full control of what is kept and removed in a piece, realize that some lines or words are essential, but may not draw the reader's attention. If the line is important to the writer, and no one selects or notices it, the writer should take this into consideration.

A workshop group could also be more critical, POINTING at words, phrases, or sentences that the reviewer did NOT like. But this takes a strong backbone and trust.

HOMEWORK: Please finish reading The Martian Chronicles. Try writing a story in Bradbury's style. Some literary devices that he uses that you might consider using are:

• Allusion
• Symbolism
• Science Fiction tropes (spaceships, aliens, communication, speculative ideas, utopias/dystopias, etc.)
• Setting and vivid description
• Conflict: human versus other; or human versus setting

Ray Bradbury: Martian Chronicles

Please get into groups of 2-3 and read pages 14-16, the short story "The Summer Night."

After you read, please examine and discuss the following:
1. What literary devices is Bradbury using in the 1st paragraph? What is the effect of this device on the meaning or flow of the story.
2. What specific words create tone in the first paragraph? What is that tone?
3. Look at the first 20 lines. Identify the pattern of sentences Bradbury is using (sentences can be simple, compound, complex, or compound-complex.)
4. The two italicized poetry sections are allusions. What do they allude to? How does Bradbury use allusion to make a statement about his theme or main point?
5. What kind of ending does Bradbury give us at the end of the story? Why do you think he chose that kind?

Complete these 5 ?'s (with your groups) and turn in for participation credit by the end of period 7.

FORUM POST: Please answer the question on the forum during today's class.

Workshopping & Drafting

Today in class please complete the following:

1. Revise and rewrite your 1st draft story or haiku from the workshop last class.

When revising:

• Consider changing the form (would this piece work better as a poem, play, or an essay?)
• Consider changing the protagonist (does your character change? Is your protagonist interesting and involved in the plot?)
• Consider theme, setting, and detail that is often left out of a first draft
• Consider the arrangement of your plot. Is your story too predictable? Too obvious? You may wish to arrange your story as a circular plot or pattern or as a flashback as opposed to linear.
• Revise and craft sentence or structure of your writing to be more effective
• Remove characters that do not add or progress your story
• Remove scenes that do not progress the story or plot or characterization or theme, etc.
• Remove words that are vague, redundant, or unnecessary
• Add or remove dialogue (add or remove scenes)
• Add poetic and literary devices

2. Turn in your updated draft for credit.

3. Post an answer to the question on The Martian Chronicles to our forum.

4. Look through your portfolio from the 1st semester and revise a poem or story you've already written, but CRAFT your work or prepare it for our next workshop (Friday).

5. Write a new story, haiku, or poem as you wish.

6. Get caught up. If you haven't completed your previous class work, please complete immediately and turn in for credit.

HOMEWORK: Please work to complete The Martian Chronicles (there will be a test Tuesday on the book). Prepare a piece of writing for a workshop Friday.

Workshop & Haiku

Today please get into the following workshop groups and conduct a workshop. Before you rush into this, please read the following very carefully:

Workshop groups:
A: Amelia, Clara, Yuliya, Evan, Darren, Dominic
B: Sierra, Syasia, Lizbeth, Jack, Neriah
C: Raven, Hannah, Tim, Caleb, Taina

Workshopping a written piece is an important step in getting feedback about your writing. If a workshop group is knowledgeable, they can help a writer grow immensely in a short period of time.

Follow these steps to complete your workshop:

1. Get into your workshop group
2. If a writer has something to share, please print 5-6 copies of the work and distribute to the workshop group.
3. Each contributing writer should take turns reading their work out loud to the rest of the group.
4. The group should listen and read silently with his/her copy while the writer reads his/her work.
5. As the writer reads his/her story or poem, the workshop members should highlight or mark specific words or phrases or lines that he/she liked. Try the technique of POINTING. Go around the workshop circle and list and read the lines or parts of the author's work you liked best. (choose 1-3 sentences, phrases, or sections)
6. Consider the basic questions and techniques of fiction. (plot, character, POV, setting, theme, mood, voice, poetry, imagery, dialogue, characterization, conflict, suspense, etc.) Give the writer a WRITTEN critique of their story based on these questions. Write your comments on the story copy.
7. When everyone is finished writing, open the discussion to the writer’s specific questions. Writers should help this along by asking questions that they want to know about their stories. For example: Did you understand the point of my story? Are the characters clear and well defined or developed? Does the setting of my story distract you as a reader? Etc.
8. After you have discussed the writer’s work, please return your copies to the writer.
9. After the group has finished helping the writer, please continue around the group to help critique the other writers who submitted material as well.
10. Continue this until the entire group has had a chance to participate in the workshop.
11. When everyone has had a chance, writers may talk to each other about new ideas and share other writing they have written (in their journal, portfolio, or etc.)

When your workshop group is done, please go back to your seats and make revisions to your first draft, or write some more haiku.

Spring kigo:  (use these spring kigo to inspire your ideas):

balmy night, departing spring, tranquility, vernal equinox, lengthening days, muddy road, melting snow, lingering snow, slush, thin mist, haze, moon, flood, Memorial Day, Easter, Passover, kite, balloon, wild geese returning, any baby animal, nightingale, hawthorn, pussy willow, tulip, snow drop, plum blossom, cherry blossom, violet, Mother's Day, April Fool's Day
 

Draft #1: Short Story (Bradbury-Style) & Haiku #1

Today, continue working on your Bradbury-style story. Check the post below for details. You are attempting either Bradbury's technique for coming up with ideas, the advice from Damon Knight, or writing a story without a protagonist.

In any case, please use your time today in class to complete a draft of the story. If you do not complete the draft today in class, please complete over the weekend as homework.

Haiku: 
Haiku Website #1
Haiku Website #2
Haiku Website #3

Please read haiku. You can read a lot of this stuff very quickly as a break from your fiction writing. Look here for some samples. The more you read, the more you'll understand the form. For the craft, take a look at the next part of this blog entry.

Haiku juxtaposes or contrasts ideas. Frequently, contrasts are set up with the first two lines presenting one idea and then switching suddenly to another idea by the closing of the poem. This technique is referred to as cutting or kireji.

Cutting involves juxtaposition of images. One image balances a second, effectively creating two parts to a haiku. These two sections should enhance and work off each other like a good friend. In English, the contrast is often emphasized with punctuation such as a long dash (em-dash) or ellipsis. One handy way to do this is to read the first two lines (they should make sense), then read the 2nd and last line. If both phrases make sense, you've probably got a good haiku.

Haiku uses a seasonal or key word called kigo. Each season has its own kigo.

Winter imagery, for example, often depicts grief, death, distance, and serenity. Take a look at some winter kigo and see if you can use it as a central image in your own haiku:

Season: Winter

• Freezing rain or freezing drizzle
• Sleigh rides
• Snowfall, Blizzard
• Snow or ice sculptures (snowmen, etc)
• Football Playoffs: "The Super Bowl"
• Ice fishing
• Ice hockey
• Ice skating
• Polar plunges
• Sledding, Tobaggoning
• Snowboarding
• Skiing
• Snow shoeing
• Snow shoveling
• Candles, firewood, fireplaces, etc.
• Christmas Eve, Christmas Day
• Earth Day
• Epiphany (Episcopal, Catholic)
• Groundhog Day
• Hanukkah
• Martin Luther King Jr., Day
• Lincoln's Birthday (12th February)
• President's Day
• Pearl Harbor Day
• St. Valentine's Day
• Washington's Birthday (22nd February)
• Midterms
• Blue jays
• Cardinals
• Chickadees
• Juncos
• Mockingbirds, northern
• Owls
• Sparrows
• Crows (Rochester)
• Titmouse, tufted
• Woodpeckers
• Poinsettia
• Norway pines

Activity: Write a page of haiku.
HOMEWORK: Continue reading The Martian Chronicles. Aim to complete this book by Monday. Please check the background material to help you understand the work (see posts and links below!) Complete your short story draft for a workshop on Monday, as well.